Again, a word of caution: As you proceed through these questions with each other, keep in mind that the tongue has the power of life and death (Pro.18:21) So choose and use your words carefully!
What do you most want right now in our marriage? What three areas of your life need the most attention from me right now?
What room in my life do you have the hardest time getting into? Why is that?
In what ways do we keep score?
What do you have the hardest time asking me for (or about) sexually? Why is this difficult or uncomfortable for you?
What in our marriage must be torn down before we can build something new in its place?
When is physical affection most satisfying for you? When is it least welcome?
When we argue, do you usually think I am more interested in winning or understanding? What do I do that makes you think this?
When do you have the hardest time saying, I love you? When do you have the hardest time saying, Im sorry.?
What are the words you most regret saying to me? What are the words you most value hearing from me? Why?
In what ways does your happiness depend on changes I need to make?
If you were to write one golden rule for a happy, healthy marriage, what would this rule be?
In what ways are we a perfect match? In what ways do our differences create friction? What can we do to capitalize on our differences so they enhance our marriage?
What other couples marriage do you most admire? Why? What is it about their relationship you wish we had more of in ours?
E. Stanley Jones once said, O Christ, do not give me tasks equal to my powers, but give me powers equal to my tasks, for I want to be stretched by things too great for me. Where do you want to be stretched for greatness in your personal life? In our marriage?
Do you ever feel that no matter what you do in our marriage, it is never good enough for you? For me? If so, explain why you feel that way.
+Questions drawn from 201 Great Questions for Married Couples Jerry D. Jones, NavPressViews: 13